Mountain Man Regret (Mountain Men Book 2) Read online

  Faith’s gaze flicked my way and I could tell she was debated what to tell him.

  “He went to her house because he needed to deliver a message for Ethan and me to stop digging. They know we’re onto them and they want us to back off.”

  Jackson’s eyebrows drew together even more tightly. “But why would he threaten Faith to get a message to you?”

  “Because he believes there’s something between us,” I said.

  Jackson took a small step away from Faith and for the first time ever, I saw him look at her with distrust in his eyes.

  Faith had to have noticed it too.

  “And is there?” he asked.

  “No, Jacks, there’s nothing between us.”

  When I snorted, Faith glared at me. “It’s the truth! Tell him.”

  Jackson drew his brows together. “Are you two—?”

  “No!” Faith exclaimed. “I’m not sleeping with him, I swear. I would never lie to you about this, Jacks. You’ve got to believe me.”

  It appeared as if Jackson was indeed beginning to believe what she was telling him, so naturally, I went and opened my big mouth.

  I just couldn’t leave it alone.

  I shot Faith a penetrating look. “You don’t have to be sleeping with someone to have feelings for them. Just saying.”

  The mistrust was back in Jackson’s eyes in an instant.

  “If you’ve got feelings for Coop then you’d better tell me now,” Jackson said. “Because you can’t have us both, Faith. You need to chose who you want.”

  I was glad he felt that way because I had no intention of sharing her, with Jackson or anyone.

  Faith opened her mouth, but yet again, words failed her and it was in that instant that I knew that she wanted me every bit as much as I wanted her. She couldn’t deny it, to Jackson, or to herself.

  “I guess that’s my answer,” Jackson said quietly.

  Faith reached out for him when he started walking towards the door. “No, Jacks, come on. Don’t walk away from me. This can work. We can make it work. We have a chance to build something.”

  “That’s what I wanted,” Jackson said. “It’s what I’ve always wanted. But we can’t build something on lies. I don’t want to be with you if you’re in love with someone else.”

  Faith looked over at me and I saw the indecision in her eyes. I couldn’t blame her. I’d hardly given her a reason to want to pick me. As far as she was aware, I didn’t want her for anything other than a quick roll in the hay.

  I hadn’t made my intentions towards her clear.

  I’d have to rectify that, but it wasn’t the time or place. I needed to tell her how I felt when we were alone, and preferably when she didn’t want to murder me and bury my body somewhere no one would find it.

  “I don’t think you should go home,” Jackson said, abruptly changing the subject. “Owen clearly isn’t stable right now. We don’t know that he won’t come back to your house or that he hasn’t told other people where you live.”

  Faith looked genuinely scared by the prospect. “I could stay at my mom’s place,” she suggested.

  “No,” Jackson and I said in unison.

  Jackson screwed up his face in distaste as he regarded me.

  “You grew up in that house,” he reminded her. “It would be the first place that Owen or anyone else would look.”

  “Well, she can’t stay at your place,” I said. “You can hardly take her into the lion’s den.”

  “I could stay at one of my friends h—“

  “Can she stay here, with you?” Jackson asked me.

  “Yes. Of course she can.” I answered without hesitation.

  Faith’s mouth dropped open in surprise. “What? There is no way in hell that I’m staying here,” she said petulantly. “How can you even suggest that, Jacks?”

  “You’re staying here,” I informed her. “It’s the only way I can be sure you’re safe.”

  She narrowed her eyes. “No way.”

  “If you stay here,” Jackson said with a shrug. “At least we’ll find out one way or another how you really feel about him.”

  I was counting on it.

  “It’s settled then,” I said, a little too cheerfully.

  They both glared at me.

  Seemed like there was a lot of that going around.

  Chapter Eleven

  Faith

  I followed Coop up the stairs to his apartment which was situated around the back of the club. It wasn’t the first time I’d been there, of course, and my stomach fluttered nervously as I remembered what had happened the first time.

  “I don’t see the point of this,” I groused. “Owen wouldn’t be stupid enough to come back to my house again. At least, not so soon after the first time.”

  “Owen would be that stupid,” Coop replied. “You can count on it.”

  He unlocked the door then stood aside for me to enter first.

  “Besides,” he added as he closed the door behind us, “Even if he wasn’t, I wouldn’t be prepared to take the risk.”

  “Why not?”

  “Why do you think? Because I don’t want anything to happen to you. That’s why. You’re important to me.”

  His words stopped me dead in my tracks.

  “Oh please. That’s bullshit! You’ve barely looked at me in the last three years and now I’m important to you? What a crock.”

  “Jesus, I’m telling you the truth,” he said. “You’ve always been important to me, whether you realize it or not.”

  I shook my head, exasperated. “Don’t try to play me for a fool, Coop. If you’re trying to seduce me again, it won’t work. I’m seeing Jackson and I don’t cheat.”

  He glared at me. “Why the hell can’t you believe that you might mean something to me? For your information, the night we spent together was the best night of my life and I’ve thought about you constantly, ever since.

  “And don’t tell me I’ve barely looked at you. When you’re in my bar, I can’t look anywhere Goddamn else!”

  I stared at him with wide, unblinking eyes. I was ready and more than willing to argue with him about this, but Coop wasn’t done.

  “Why do you think nothing has ever happened between us, again huh?”

  I huffed out a laugh. “That’s easy. It’s because you’re a slut who wants to bed as many women as you can. You don’t sleep with women twice because you might be missing out on someone you haven’t screwed yet. Plus,” I went on, “I’m not stupid enough to fall for your charm a second time.”

  He looked annoyed now, but I was only calling it like I saw it.

  “We never slept together again,” he said calmly, “Because I would have been in danger of falling for you and falling hard. I wasn’t prepared to make myself that vulnerable again. I did it once before and look where it got me.”

  Raw hurt glittered in his dark eyes and I realized that for the first time ever, Coop had given me a glimpse through a window in his soul. He actually had made himself that vulnerable again, even if it hadn’t been his intention, but what did it matter?

  It was all well and good for Coop to acknowledge his behavior, but it counted for nothing. Knowing the reason why he slept around with so many women and changing his ways were two different things entirely.

  Did he even want to change?

  And if so, why now?

  Part of me was still reeling about the fact that Coop had admitted that he could have fallen for me, but I tried not to dwell on it. I’d allowed myself to hope that something could have developed between us once before and I’d ended up feeling used and empty for a long time.

  I had Jackson in my life now, someone capable of love and someone who wanted me wholeheartedly. I couldn’t throw that away for the promise of something that might never happen with Coop.

  “I know that you lost someone you loved deeply,” I said. “I get that you were hurt, but you can’t use that as an excuse to never open your heart to anyone else again. And you can’t use it
as an excuse to treat women as if they are objects for your personal gratification.

  “You know, it’s a shame that you couldn’t have made yourself that vulnerable before because I’m not Caroline and if you’d given me a chance back then we could have had something real—something good.”

  Coop was quiet for a long moment, but when he next met my gaze, hope swirled in the depths of his eyes. “We still could.”

  If he’d said those very words to me just a few short weeks ago, in all likelihood I would have thrown myself into his arms. But now, they didn’t feel like enough. There was too much at stake and it was too big a risk—a risk I couldn’t justify taking.

  I shook my head regretfully. “It’s too late, Coop.”

  His expression became resolute. “I don’t believe that and deep down, I don’t think you do, either.”

  He scrubbed a hand over his beard, looking suddenly worn out.

  “Get some sleep, okay You’ve had a stressful day. We can talk about this in the morning after you’ve had some rest.

  “Take my bedroom. I’ll sleep on the couch. Feel free to use whatever shirt you can find in one of the drawers.”

  I wanted to tell him that there would be no more discussion on this topic, in the morning or at any other time. It was done—we were done.

  But Coop had already started walking down the hall to the bathroom.

  “Coop!” I called after him, needing him to hear me out.

  I didn’t want to sleep on it or think about because I was afraid my resolve my falter and and give in to him.

  He turned, but he didn’t meet my gaze again.

  “Goodnight, Faith. Sleep tight.”

  He disappeared into the bathroom and closed the door quietly behind him.

  I stood there for a moment, frozen, my feet feeling like lead weights—too heavy to lift off the floor and get me moving to where I needed to go.

  Eventually, I found the strength to move them and put one foot after the other until I’d reached the threshold to Coop’s bedroom.

  I was afraid to go inside.

  It looked much like it had when I’d last been there, only on that occasion, I’d had Coop’s lips attached to mine so I hadn’t had the time to take a good look around at the space.

  I walked further into the room then closed the door. It felt strange being in Coop’s space without him, like I was an intruder in his life, even though he’d invited me there. In fact, he’d practically orchestrated it by calling Jackson—which I was still furious about.

  Why had he gone to such great lengths to get me to stay at his place if it wasn’t to try to sleep with me again?

  Could he really be ready for a relationship?

  And did he honestly want one with me?

  I shook the thought from my mind. No. I couldn’t think like that. I’d end up getting hurt all over again. Coop didn’t do relationships and he didn’t do commitment. I needed to remember that.

  I grabbed one of his old shirts then changed into it before crawling under the covers. I lifted the collar to my nose and inhaled deeply, but the shirt carried no trace of his scent, only of the washing up powder he’d used on it. I hated that I was so disappointed.

  The events of the day had started to take their toll on me and, after setting the alarm on my cell phone, I leaned my head back against the soft pillows and promptly fell asleep.

  When the sound of music playing woke me, I sat bolt upright and tried to get my bearings. I realized that the music was coming from my phone so I grabbed it and answered the call.

  “Hello?”

  “Faith, it’s Mina. Did I wake you?”

  “Yeah,” I mumbled, my brow scrunched together. Why was my sister calling me in the middle of the night? “What time is it?”

  “It’s after two. Listen, Mom just called. She fell out of bed and she can’t get up. I’m on my way around there now. Can you meet me?”

  That woke me up quicker than a slap to the face. “She fell? Is she hurt?”

  I scrambled out of bed and began to change out of Coop’s shirt.

  “No, she said she was fine. But I think she’s been on the floor for a couple of hours, trying to get herself up. She said she didn’t want to call right away because she didn’t want to bother me.”

  “Damn stubborn woman.”

  “That’s what I said. I wouldn’t have called you only Tony is away at a teachers’ conference so I’m on my own with the kids and I don’t think I’ll be able to pick her up by myself.”

  “What, no, are you crazy? Of course you should have called me. I’m annoyed that she didn’t call me herself.”

  “You know what she’s like. She wouldn’t have wanted to bother you either. She only called me because she thought that Tony was here and could help me.”

  “Are you bringing the kids?”

  “No, I just called my neighbor, Tess, she’s on her way here to watch them for me. I didn’t want them to see mom on the floor like that, it would have scared them.”

  I zipped up my jeans then slid my feet into my pumps. “I’m leaving now. I’ll meet you over there.”

  “Okay, see you in a few.”

  She hung up.

  Shit.

  I pulled my sweatshirt over my head as I fought to stave off the tears. I hated that my mom was all alone. The thought that she could have been lying there on the floor for hours, too proud to call for help, broke my heart. She’d been doing so well lately, but this would knock her confidence for sure.

  I slid my cell phone into the back pocket of my jeans then quietly opened the bedroom door. I crept out into the hallway and tiptoed down through the living room. I very nearly walked into the wall, but I stopped myself right at the last moment. I was almost to the door when the room flooded with light.

  I winced when I saw Coop sitting up on the couch watching me with disapproving eyes.

  “Where do you think you’re going?”

  I didn’t have the time to sugar coat my life, my mom needed me so I told it like it was.

  “My mom fell out of bed and she can’t get back up. I’m meeting my sister there.”

  Coop sprang up from the couch with the effortlessness and grace of an Olympic athlete.

  “I’m coming with you. Give me a minute.”

  “Coop, there’s no need—“

  “I’m coming,” he insisted.

  I was too tired to argue.

  I waited while he pulled on his jeans and slid his feet into his motorcycle boots. After he’d zipped up his leather jacket, he grabbed two helmets then handed me one.

  “Put this on.”

  “Coop, I’m not riding on the back of—“

  “We’ll get there quicker on the Harley,” he said, grabbing my hand and pulling me towards the door.

  I couldn’t argue with his logic so I didn’t try. I put on the damn helmet and followed him down to his motorcycle. I’d never even sat on one before so I wasn’t quite sure what to do. He must have seen the doubt on my face because he called it right.

  “You’ve never ridden before, have you?”

  “No.”

  “It’s easy. Just hold on tight and when I turn and lean into the bend, lean with me.”

  I was a little bit afraid, but I didn’t let it show. “Okay.”

  He nodded then started the engine. “Climb on.”

  I cocked my leg over then looked for where to rest my feet. When I’d found a comfortable spot, I wrapped my arms around his middle and as soon as I had a tight grip, Coop revved the engine then pulled the motorcycle out of the parking lot.

  I gasped, part in fear and part in excitement as we raced through the streets. Coop hadn’t asked me where my mom lived, so it surprised me a little when we rode into her street then pulled up outside her front door.

  He shut off the engine then held my hand as I got off before dismounting the motorcycle himself.

  “Like it?” he asked as we walked up to my mom’s front door.

  I nodded. “
Yeah, I did.”

  His smile broadened in approval. “Good. One day soon I’ll take you for a proper ride.”

  I started to get excited about that before I realized what a really bad idea it would be. I shouldn’t be doing anything or going anywhere with Cooper Brown—it would feel too much like a date. Which I was fairly sure was exactly what it was intended to be.

  I shook my head, annoyed with myself as I reached into my pocket for my car keys then found the key to my mom’s house on the chain. I unlocked the door, aware that I still hadn’t given Coop an answer as I headed for my mom’s bedroom.

  “Mom!” I called out. “It’s Faith.”

  “In here, darling,” she called back.

  As if she would be anywhere else.

  I walked into her bedroom and a sob caught in the back of my throat. She was sprawled out on her back with nothing but a thin, cotton nightshirt to protect her from the early morning chill.

  “Mom!” I said running to her side. “Why didn’t you call me? You must be freezing. How long have you been lying here?”

  She shrugged. “A couple of hours. I managed to grab the phone off the nightstand, but I didn’t have the strength to pull one of the blankets off the bed. We tucked them in pretty tight.”

  A tear slid down my cheek. “It’s okay. We’re here now. We’re going to help you get up.”

  “Oh, is your sister with y…”

  She looked towards the door for the first time.

  Even though it was dark, I could clearly see that the large, muscular frame of Coop standing beneath the doorframe, in no way resembled my sister.

  So she had to see it, too.

  “Jackson, is that you?”

  Coop cleared his throat. “Uh, no Ma’am,” he said. “It’s Coop. Cooper Brown.”

  “Coop?”

  I squinted to try to see my mom’s expression, but I couldn’t make it out. I could imagine the confusion on her face though as she looked up at me.

  “Mom, we’re going to switch the light on, okay?”

  She sighed. “Okay.”

  “Coop, can you get the light, please? It’s on the wall beside you.”